Bahrain 15
Bangladesh 5.0
Barbados 9.4
Belarus 0.7
Belgium 7.3
Belize 12.6
Bermuda 4.5
Bhutan 4.0
Bolivia 6.0
Bosnia and Herzegovina 29.2
Botswana 7.5
Brazil 6.5
British Virgin Islands (United Kingdom) 3.1
Brunei 3.7
Bulgaria 11.2
Burma 4.9
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
Monday, August 8, 2011
Useful toll free numbers - Mumbai
Airlines
Indian Airlines – (1800 180 1407)
Jet Airways – (1800 22 5522)
Spice Jet – (1800 180 3333)
Kingfisher – (1800 180 0101)
Banks
ABN AMRO – (1800 11 2224)
Canara Bank – (1800 44 6000)
Citibank – (1800 44 2265)
Corporation Bank – (1800 443 555)
Development Credit Bank – (1800 22 5769)
HDFC Bank – (1800 227 227)
ICICI Bank – (1800 333 499)
ICICI Bank NRI – (1800 22 4848)
IDBI Bank – (1800 11 6999)
Indian Bank – (1800 425 1400)
ING Vysya – (1800 44 9900)
Kotak Mahindra Bank – (1800 22 6022)
Punjab National Bank – (1800 122 222)
State Bank of India – (1800 44 1955)
Syndicate Bank – (1800 44 6655)
Automobiles
Mahindra Scorpio – (1800 22 6006)
Maruti – (1800 111 515)
Tata Motors – (1800 22 5552)
Windshield Experts – (1800 11 3636)
Computers/IT
Adrenalin – (1800 444 445)
AMD – (1800 425 6664)
Apple Computers – (1800 444 683)
Canon – (1800 333 366)
Cisco Systems – (1800 221 777)
Compaq – HP – (1800 444 999)
Data One Broadband – (1800 424 1800)
Dell – (1800 444 026)
Epson – (1800 44 0011)
eSys – (3970 0011)
Genesis Tally Academy – (1800 444 888)
HCL – (1800 180 8080)
IBM – (1800 443 333)
Lexmark – (1800 22 4477)
Marshal’s Point – (1800 33 4488)
Microsoft – (1800 111 100)
Microsoft Virus Update – (1901 333 334)
Seagate – (1800 180 1104)
Symantec – (1800 44 5533)
TVS Electronics – (1800 444 566)
WeP Peripherals – (1800 44 6446)
Wipro – (1800 333 312)
Xerox – (1800 180 1225)
Zenith – (1800 222 004)
Railways
Indian Railway General Enquiry 131
Indian Railway Central Enquiry 131
Indian Railway Reservation 131
Indian Railway Railway Reservation Enquiry 1345,1335,1330
Indian Railway Centralised Railway Enquiry 1330/1/2/3/4/ 5/6/7/8/9
Couriers/Packers & Movers
ABT Courier – (1800 44 8585)
AFL Wizz – (1800 22 9696)
Agarwal Packers & Movers – (1800 11 4321)
Associated Packers P Ltd – (1800 21 4560)
DHL – (1800 111 345)
FedEx – (1800 22 6161)
Goel Packers & Movers – (1800 11 3456)
UPS – (1800 22 7171)
Home Appliances
Aiwa/Sony – (1800 11 1188)
Anchor Switches – (1800 22 7979)
Blue Star – (1800 22 2200)
Bose Audio – (1800 11 2673)
Bru Coffee Vending Machines – (1800 44 7171)
Daikin Air Conditioners – (1800 444 222)
DishTV – (1800 12 3474)
Faber Chimneys – (1800 21 4595)
Godrej – (1800 22 5511)
Grundfos Pumps – (1800 33 4555)
LG – (1901 180 9999)
Philips – (1800 22 4422)
Samsung – (1800 113 444)
Sanyo – (1800 11 0101)
Voltas – (1800 33 4546)
WorldSpace Satellite Radio – (1800 44 5432)
Investments/ Finance
CAMS – (1800 44 2267)
Chola Mutual Fund – (1800 22 2300)
Easy IPO’s – (3030 5757)
Fidelity Investments – (1800 180 8000)
Franklin Templeton Fund – (1800 425 4255)
J M Morgan Stanley – (1800 22 0004)
Kotak Mutual Fund – (1800 222 626)
LIC Housing Finance – (1800 44 0005)
SBI Mutual Fund – (1800 22 3040)
Sharekhan – (1800 22 7500)
Tata Mutual Fund – (1800 22 0101)
Travel
Club Mahindra Holidays – (1800 33 4539)
Cox & Kings – (1800 22 1235)
God TV Tours – (1800 442 777)
Kerala Tourism – (1800 444 747)
Kumarakom Lake Resort – (1800 44 5030
Raj Travels & Tours – (1800 22 9900)
Sita Tours – (1800 111 911)
SOTC Tours – (1800 22 3344)
Healthcare
Best on Health – (1800 11 8899)
Dr Batras – (1800 11 6767)
GlaxoSmithKline – (1800 22 8797)
Johnson & Johnson – (1800 22 8111)
Kaya Skin Clinic – (1800 22 5292)
LifeCell – (1800 44 5323)
Manmar Technologies – (1800 33 4420)
Pfizer – (1800 442 442)
Roche Accu-Chek – (1800 11 4546)
Rudraksha – (1800 21 4708)
Varilux Lenses – (1800 44 8383)
VLCC – (1800 33 1262)
Insurance
AMP Sanmar – (1800 44 2200)
Aviva – (1800 33 2244)
Bajaj Allianz – (1800 22 5858)
Chola MS General Insurance – (1800 44 5544)
HDFC Standard Life – (1800 227 227)
LIC – (1800 33 4433)
Max New York Life – (1800 33 5577)
Royal Sundaram – (1800 33 8899)
SBI Life Insurance – (1800 22 9090)
Hotel Reservations
GRT Grand – (1800 44 5500)
InterContinental Hotels Group – (1800 111 000)
Marriott – (1800 22 0044)
Sarovar Park Plaza – (1800 111 222)
Taj Holidays – (1800 111 825)
Teleshopping
Asian Sky Shop – (1800 22 1800)
Jaipan Teleshoppe – (1800 11 5225)
Tele Brands – (1800 11 8000)
VMI Teleshopping – (1800 447 777)
WWS Teleshopping – (1800 220 777)
Others
Domino’s Pizza – (1800 111 123)
Cell Phones
BenQ – (1800 22 08 08)
Motorola MotoAssist – (1800 11 1211)
Nokia – (3030 3838)
Sony Ericsson – (3901 1111)
Mattresses
Kurl-on – 1800 44 0404
Sleepwell – 1800 11 2266
Indian Airlines – (1800 180 1407)
Jet Airways – (1800 22 5522)
Spice Jet – (1800 180 3333)
Kingfisher – (1800 180 0101)
Banks
ABN AMRO – (1800 11 2224)
Canara Bank – (1800 44 6000)
Citibank – (1800 44 2265)
Corporation Bank – (1800 443 555)
Development Credit Bank – (1800 22 5769)
HDFC Bank – (1800 227 227)
ICICI Bank – (1800 333 499)
ICICI Bank NRI – (1800 22 4848)
IDBI Bank – (1800 11 6999)
Indian Bank – (1800 425 1400)
ING Vysya – (1800 44 9900)
Kotak Mahindra Bank – (1800 22 6022)
Punjab National Bank – (1800 122 222)
State Bank of India – (1800 44 1955)
Syndicate Bank – (1800 44 6655)
Automobiles
Mahindra Scorpio – (1800 22 6006)
Maruti – (1800 111 515)
Tata Motors – (1800 22 5552)
Windshield Experts – (1800 11 3636)
Computers/IT
Adrenalin – (1800 444 445)
AMD – (1800 425 6664)
Apple Computers – (1800 444 683)
Canon – (1800 333 366)
Cisco Systems – (1800 221 777)
Compaq – HP – (1800 444 999)
Data One Broadband – (1800 424 1800)
Dell – (1800 444 026)
Epson – (1800 44 0011)
eSys – (3970 0011)
Genesis Tally Academy – (1800 444 888)
HCL – (1800 180 8080)
IBM – (1800 443 333)
Lexmark – (1800 22 4477)
Marshal’s Point – (1800 33 4488)
Microsoft – (1800 111 100)
Microsoft Virus Update – (1901 333 334)
Seagate – (1800 180 1104)
Symantec – (1800 44 5533)
TVS Electronics – (1800 444 566)
WeP Peripherals – (1800 44 6446)
Wipro – (1800 333 312)
Xerox – (1800 180 1225)
Zenith – (1800 222 004)
Railways
Indian Railway General Enquiry 131
Indian Railway Central Enquiry 131
Indian Railway Reservation 131
Indian Railway Railway Reservation Enquiry 1345,1335,1330
Indian Railway Centralised Railway Enquiry 1330/1/2/3/4/ 5/6/7/8/9
Couriers/Packers & Movers
ABT Courier – (1800 44 8585)
AFL Wizz – (1800 22 9696)
Agarwal Packers & Movers – (1800 11 4321)
Associated Packers P Ltd – (1800 21 4560)
DHL – (1800 111 345)
FedEx – (1800 22 6161)
Goel Packers & Movers – (1800 11 3456)
UPS – (1800 22 7171)
Home Appliances
Aiwa/Sony – (1800 11 1188)
Anchor Switches – (1800 22 7979)
Blue Star – (1800 22 2200)
Bose Audio – (1800 11 2673)
Bru Coffee Vending Machines – (1800 44 7171)
Daikin Air Conditioners – (1800 444 222)
DishTV – (1800 12 3474)
Faber Chimneys – (1800 21 4595)
Godrej – (1800 22 5511)
Grundfos Pumps – (1800 33 4555)
LG – (1901 180 9999)
Philips – (1800 22 4422)
Samsung – (1800 113 444)
Sanyo – (1800 11 0101)
Voltas – (1800 33 4546)
WorldSpace Satellite Radio – (1800 44 5432)
Investments/ Finance
CAMS – (1800 44 2267)
Chola Mutual Fund – (1800 22 2300)
Easy IPO’s – (3030 5757)
Fidelity Investments – (1800 180 8000)
Franklin Templeton Fund – (1800 425 4255)
J M Morgan Stanley – (1800 22 0004)
Kotak Mutual Fund – (1800 222 626)
LIC Housing Finance – (1800 44 0005)
SBI Mutual Fund – (1800 22 3040)
Sharekhan – (1800 22 7500)
Tata Mutual Fund – (1800 22 0101)
Travel
Club Mahindra Holidays – (1800 33 4539)
Cox & Kings – (1800 22 1235)
God TV Tours – (1800 442 777)
Kerala Tourism – (1800 444 747)
Kumarakom Lake Resort – (1800 44 5030
Raj Travels & Tours – (1800 22 9900)
Sita Tours – (1800 111 911)
SOTC Tours – (1800 22 3344)
Healthcare
Best on Health – (1800 11 8899)
Dr Batras – (1800 11 6767)
GlaxoSmithKline – (1800 22 8797)
Johnson & Johnson – (1800 22 8111)
Kaya Skin Clinic – (1800 22 5292)
LifeCell – (1800 44 5323)
Manmar Technologies – (1800 33 4420)
Pfizer – (1800 442 442)
Roche Accu-Chek – (1800 11 4546)
Rudraksha – (1800 21 4708)
Varilux Lenses – (1800 44 8383)
VLCC – (1800 33 1262)
Insurance
AMP Sanmar – (1800 44 2200)
Aviva – (1800 33 2244)
Bajaj Allianz – (1800 22 5858)
Chola MS General Insurance – (1800 44 5544)
HDFC Standard Life – (1800 227 227)
LIC – (1800 33 4433)
Max New York Life – (1800 33 5577)
Royal Sundaram – (1800 33 8899)
SBI Life Insurance – (1800 22 9090)
Hotel Reservations
GRT Grand – (1800 44 5500)
InterContinental Hotels Group – (1800 111 000)
Marriott – (1800 22 0044)
Sarovar Park Plaza – (1800 111 222)
Taj Holidays – (1800 111 825)
Teleshopping
Asian Sky Shop – (1800 22 1800)
Jaipan Teleshoppe – (1800 11 5225)
Tele Brands – (1800 11 8000)
VMI Teleshopping – (1800 447 777)
WWS Teleshopping – (1800 220 777)
Others
Domino’s Pizza – (1800 111 123)
Cell Phones
BenQ – (1800 22 08 08)
Motorola MotoAssist – (1800 11 1211)
Nokia – (3030 3838)
Sony Ericsson – (3901 1111)
Mattresses
Kurl-on – 1800 44 0404
Sleepwell – 1800 11 2266
real names
Real names of real people who we know exist and are not just made up for comedic effect:
John Wheel
Brian Wardrobe
Caroline Cheese
Norman Christmas
Graham Sex
Debbie Bugler
Brian Gay
John Wheel
Brian Wardrobe
Caroline Cheese
Norman Christmas
Graham Sex
Debbie Bugler
Brian Gay
Friday, August 5, 2011
Ross Skinner Bingo
YOU DID WHAT SORRY?!
SOUNDS PAINFUL
IT’S HUMP DAY; UPHILL FROM MONDAY, DOWNHILL TO FRIDAY
HE’S KICKED THE BUCKET
FUBAR/SNAFU (one always triggers the other, and an explanation of the etymology)
THE DAYTONA
1900 AND FROZEN TO DEATH
YOU CAN ASK ME WHATEVER YOU LIKE, WHETHER YOU GET A SENSIBLE ANSWER OR NOT IS A DIFFERENT THING
FORTY TWO
BOTTOM BRACKET
SEE YOU AT THE WINNING POST
HEADWIND/TAILWIND
I NEED TO HAVE A SMALL BONFIRE
HE HAD TO GIVE ME AN INJECTION TO EXTRACT MY WALLET
GUZONTIKE (german)
YEAH, RIGHT
I KNOW NAATHING
FAIR ENOUGH
SCUSE EMOIR MESHURE (french)
WIRE BRUSH AND DETTOL
HUG A COLUMN
(IS IT) A CUNNING PLAN?
IS THAT THE TIME?
MY EARS ARE BURNING
EXPLOSION IN A BISCUIT FACTORY
WHISKEY AND DOMESTOS, KILLS 99% OF ALL KNOWN GERMS AND MAKES THE REST TOO DRUNK TO WORRY ABOUT
IT’S LIKE FRENCH KNITTING WITH 300 MM PIPE
WELCOME TO [DAY OF WEEK]
WHO’S CALLING THE GOLDEN SHOT?
DO ME A FAVOUR
MAY THE FLEAS OF A THOUSAND CAMELS INFEST YOUR ARMPITS
DON’T GIVE UP YOUR DAY JOB
TEA’S UP!
SWIFT KICK IN THE COIN BOX
I’M ALRIGHT, IT’S THE OTHERS I’M WORRIED ABOUT
VIRGIN ON THE RIDICULOUS
RAINWATER PIPES SHOULD GO ON THE OUTSIDE OF THE BUILDING
ARE YOU GOING TO BLIND THEM WITH SCIENCE OR BAFFLE THEM WITH BULLSHIT?
I’LL WAKE UP IN A MINUTE
OVERRATED, OVERPAID AND OVER HERE
YES, NO OR INDIFFERENT (or any choice of two options, followed by ‘indifferent’. e.g up, down or indifferent; right, wrong or indifferent etc.)
IN A RIGHT MUCKIN’ FUDDLE
WELL THERE YOU GO
Updated daily
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1EtPGXYWmiljcZuQTn-l_ThBIV9X17aMHcrX2eKpveeA/edit?hl=en_GB&pli=1#
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